I don't think this will provide you comfort the way it did for me when my grandmother's brother and his wife died some 90 days apart, but it's a real thing. Takotsubo cardiomyopathy, colloquially known as Broken Heart Syndrome. A cascade of stress hormones triggers the heart to struggle, and it can cause arrhythmias or a heart attack which can set off a "strike". I tell you because you have a way with words, and maybe one day this nugget of information will end up in something that might heal others. Sending you love and hugs.
I am sad to hear the news. I have lost both parents, and lost father and grandmother about a month apart, so all the feelings you try to describe are very familiar, and yet words fail to adequately describe them. One case was a couple of strokes followed by two years of decline, a Monday with “a few weeks left” followed by a Wednesday evening of needing to come over now to hold their hand while they passed. The other two were gone suddenly and unexpectedly. These are not easy events to deal with. I will suggest writing down memories as they flood through now, it helped to revisit those notes when thinking of each person later. A decade or more on and there are still memories that pop up out of the blue.
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom a year ago and my dad 20 years ago. It never gets easier but you find that they left you so much behind in your mind, heart, and soul as well as the people that surround you.
I’m so sorry for your losses. My grandparents were killed instantly together by a drunk driver, and I remember how devastating that was for my family, especially their daughter, my Mom.
I think it’s so appropriate and human that you are turning to your writing and reading for solace and strength. From what you wrote about your mother, I suspect she would support your coping with your grief in that way.
Oh, Summer. This is so hard, and I think I know what you mean by how unbelievable it is. Your mom and dad are so foundational. I still feel the shock of losing my father. Holding you in the light, as my Quaker mom says…
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I've known you since your JJS days, and I know how much your family has meant to you over the years. It's a devastating thing to go through.
My own mother died a couple of months back, and even though my sister and I were providing 24 hour palliative care at home, when it actually happens it's almost surreal. Suddenly the house is quiet, the chaos stops, and you're left wondering what life is supposed to look like now. Who knew that an oxygen concentrator that is unplugged and waiting for collection could be louder in its silence than when it was running?
Donated to the GFM with love. I hope it helps ease the 'after.'
Michael, I'm so sorry about your own mother, it's awful. I know exactly what you mean, it's so strange. I'm sorry about your dear mother and thank you so much for pitching in for us 💜
Dear Summer, sending love and thoughts to you and your family. Thank you for sharing your grief and words, they mean so much to others in difficult times. X
I am so incredibly sorry. You are such a fiercely loving Taurus—I love that you work while you’re grieving that is poetically perfect. I’m sure we would all understand—and will understand—when you need to step away for a moment. My Grandparents left close together (6 months) and my husband’s grandparents left only two weeks apart—his Grandfather kept asking where his wife was (he was the last to go) and in his delirium he thought she was giving birth somewhere in the hospital to one of their five children. I think soulmates often leave together and judging by your parent’s love for one another till the end and their “hippie wedding,” they clearly are. Sending you and your family so much love. ❤️❤️❤️
My heart hurts for you & your siblings, Summer. Like you, I used to think the impossible & the possible couldn't possibly overlap. Yet, in the past 25 to 30 years, and especially over the past decade, there are many - and I count myself among them - who've come to understand the impossible and the possible can somehow coexist in the same space, in ways we often wish they wouldn't. This is definitely one of those times we wish the impossible and the possible weren't in the same space, that your mom was still physically with us on this plane of existence.
What I know of you, and your parents, I know through your writing. Your parents seemed to be wonderful & complex, much as you are. I know you & your siblings wouldn't be here without your parents, and I know that you've made the lives of many, including me, so much better by your words, your presence, and your existence. And so, your parents also made all our lives better.
Everyone has different ways they measure a life. For me, one of the highest honors is for someone to have made life better for others while they were here. Clearly, your folks did that for you, and by having & raising you, they also did so for all of us who love you.
Wherever their spirits are, I hope they know how thankful we all are for doing all they did to make the world better. I'd like to think they know. And I'd like to think their spirits are free to be together again, to go to whatever the next phase of life is.
I don't think this will provide you comfort the way it did for me when my grandmother's brother and his wife died some 90 days apart, but it's a real thing. Takotsubo cardiomyopathy, colloquially known as Broken Heart Syndrome. A cascade of stress hormones triggers the heart to struggle, and it can cause arrhythmias or a heart attack which can set off a "strike". I tell you because you have a way with words, and maybe one day this nugget of information will end up in something that might heal others. Sending you love and hugs.
Thank you, I’ve thought of this phenomenon as well. Every day.
Dear Friend,
I am sad to hear the news. I have lost both parents, and lost father and grandmother about a month apart, so all the feelings you try to describe are very familiar, and yet words fail to adequately describe them. One case was a couple of strokes followed by two years of decline, a Monday with “a few weeks left” followed by a Wednesday evening of needing to come over now to hold their hand while they passed. The other two were gone suddenly and unexpectedly. These are not easy events to deal with. I will suggest writing down memories as they flood through now, it helped to revisit those notes when thinking of each person later. A decade or more on and there are still memories that pop up out of the blue.
I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my mom a year ago and my dad 20 years ago. It never gets easier but you find that they left you so much behind in your mind, heart, and soul as well as the people that surround you.
(((Hugs)))
I’m so sorry for your losses. My grandparents were killed instantly together by a drunk driver, and I remember how devastating that was for my family, especially their daughter, my Mom.
I think it’s so appropriate and human that you are turning to your writing and reading for solace and strength. From what you wrote about your mother, I suspect she would support your coping with your grief in that way.
May her memory be a blessing.
Oh, Summer. This is so hard, and I think I know what you mean by how unbelievable it is. Your mom and dad are so foundational. I still feel the shock of losing my father. Holding you in the light, as my Quaker mom says…
Oh Summer how inconceivable that both are gone so suddenly … I am so so sorry. Damn this is so not fair!
What a gift to her, to see her through. My condolences, Summer, how devastating.
Thank you Alex.
My deepest condolences, Summer ❤️🩹
Summer, I'm so sorry for this impossible loss. I'm holding space for you and your family.
my heart aches for you ♥️♥️♥️
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I've known you since your JJS days, and I know how much your family has meant to you over the years. It's a devastating thing to go through.
My own mother died a couple of months back, and even though my sister and I were providing 24 hour palliative care at home, when it actually happens it's almost surreal. Suddenly the house is quiet, the chaos stops, and you're left wondering what life is supposed to look like now. Who knew that an oxygen concentrator that is unplugged and waiting for collection could be louder in its silence than when it was running?
Donated to the GFM with love. I hope it helps ease the 'after.'
Michael, I'm so sorry about your own mother, it's awful. I know exactly what you mean, it's so strange. I'm sorry about your dear mother and thank you so much for pitching in for us 💜
I am so very sorry.
Dear Summer, sending love and thoughts to you and your family. Thank you for sharing your grief and words, they mean so much to others in difficult times. X
I am so incredibly sorry. You are such a fiercely loving Taurus—I love that you work while you’re grieving that is poetically perfect. I’m sure we would all understand—and will understand—when you need to step away for a moment. My Grandparents left close together (6 months) and my husband’s grandparents left only two weeks apart—his Grandfather kept asking where his wife was (he was the last to go) and in his delirium he thought she was giving birth somewhere in the hospital to one of their five children. I think soulmates often leave together and judging by your parent’s love for one another till the end and their “hippie wedding,” they clearly are. Sending you and your family so much love. ❤️❤️❤️
My heart goes out to you. As you say it’s impossible.
My heart hurts for you & your siblings, Summer. Like you, I used to think the impossible & the possible couldn't possibly overlap. Yet, in the past 25 to 30 years, and especially over the past decade, there are many - and I count myself among them - who've come to understand the impossible and the possible can somehow coexist in the same space, in ways we often wish they wouldn't. This is definitely one of those times we wish the impossible and the possible weren't in the same space, that your mom was still physically with us on this plane of existence.
What I know of you, and your parents, I know through your writing. Your parents seemed to be wonderful & complex, much as you are. I know you & your siblings wouldn't be here without your parents, and I know that you've made the lives of many, including me, so much better by your words, your presence, and your existence. And so, your parents also made all our lives better.
Everyone has different ways they measure a life. For me, one of the highest honors is for someone to have made life better for others while they were here. Clearly, your folks did that for you, and by having & raising you, they also did so for all of us who love you.
Wherever their spirits are, I hope they know how thankful we all are for doing all they did to make the world better. I'd like to think they know. And I'd like to think their spirits are free to be together again, to go to whatever the next phase of life is.
Thank you to them. Thank you to you, Summer.